He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
