Grow some girl-balls and come out already
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize