Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
i think my cat just said my name.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
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