I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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