You were right. It hurts to walk today.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
