You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize