I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Randomize
