I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
