Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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