i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
