So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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