so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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