I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
