Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i think my mom watched the whole time
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
