Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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