doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize