Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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