I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
