what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
