D3 body, D1 cock
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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