just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize