No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Randomize
