if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I'm experimenting with sincerity
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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