so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
