the new term for farting is butt boxing.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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