Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
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