I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Randomize
