I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
