It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
