Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
