So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
