we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
