Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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