I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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