I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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