I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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