I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
