all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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