so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Randomize
