Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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