Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
