She said her name was "party"
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Randomize
