don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
