Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
