I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize