I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Randomize
