yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
