We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
