so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Randomize
