So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Randomize