Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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