In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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