Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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