He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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