Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize